Design

 

I’ve heard it once… that beautiful sound…

I want to hear it again…

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Many words will simply not explain this. The very entity of words seem to want me to try nonetheless.

I’ve been asked the question: “So, Hamad, what are your flaws?” in a number of contexts. My answer, back then was a simple smile and the shrugging of my shoulders. Quite often, I see that the person asking me ends up thinking that my answer pertains to being elusive, and quite contrarily, it is far from that. As simple as it may seem, I believe that the simplest questions are often the most profound, and they are often the hardest for me to answer.

Today, I have a smile on my face, minus the shrugging of my shoulders. I can try to explain it much more than is needed, but Occam would be proud of me when I say that the simple question, now has a simple answer. And it is quite interesting, yet strangely misleading, that my simple answer is quite a paradoxical one… and something tells me that Occam wouldn’t mind it this time… not even in the slightest.

Truth: I sometimes feel that the reason I’m here, in this universe, is a humorous one… like I’m being watched, and smiled upon… and I love it.

Truth: I don’t matter… and I love it.

Truth: I feel that I am accounted for, not just by people… and I love it.

Truth: My purpose may change the world, or just myself… and I love it.

Truth: I am myself… and I love it… so very much.

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I came into this world, was given a set of parameters (rules) for a given formula (society), and was told that this is how things worked. I grew up. Spent a good amount of time defying this formula and proved it (to myself) wrong on an incredible number of levels, by simply proving (again, to myself) that the base level is mathematically invalid, thus, logically, the chain reaction of invalidity followed very nicely.

And where has that left me?

Lost in my thoughts. The only place I know where things make sense.

I compare myself, my thoughts, against the choices and mathematical equations (mentalities) of other people to see just how sane I am, not how insane they are (I’ve done enough of that, believe me).

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Does the formula work? Yes. It really does.

You build a bridge from one cliff to another, and you get across. It works.

How do you build a bridge? Metallic resources and framework, applied using a base of beautifully and harmoniously orchestrated static physics principles.

Or, in our societies’ cases, people.

And when seven billion people in the world choose to cross bridges made entirely of people, it’s hard to see the moral lining. This, however, does not excuse any of us.

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I cannot make this anymore clear:

No energy in this universe is lost. (The first law of Thermodynamics)

So for those of us who do not believe in god, your choices are accounted for, one way or another. For those of us who do believe in god, your choices are accounted for… one way or another.

Thus, I welcome you, to Earth. Where you shall be tested.

Should you decide to cheat, you will gain the position you cheated yourself into having. And your choice will fail you, simply because you chose to take something that does not belong to you. Your very self, will not want to have it… and It shall be the responsibility that you cheated yourself to bear, one that you were never meant to be held accountable for. But alas, accountable you shall be held. The world was fair to you, and you chose to be unfair to yourself.

Become a person that makes life hard on everyone around you, and you will have chosen to surround yourself with hardships and misery. Become an absolute blessing and joy to everyone around you, respectful and good in every sense, and you will have chosen to surround yourself with joy, respect and that which is good. Your choices matter. They have more of a meaning than you’ll ever realize. But there’s only so much I can say to you, you have to wake up and see for yourself.

I am not your enemy, friend.

The price of the solution? “Gratitude will suffice,” he says to me.

Thus, gratitude will suffice, I say to you.

Solution:

Make every little or big thing that you say or do to anyone or anything, count, not in substance, but only in yourself. Know that if it is all energy, and energy is the one thing that can never be lost, then only that very same energy is of real value, and all else… is simply and inevitably lost, as all else was created by us, and shall undoubtedly die with us.

Be true to others, by being true to yourself.

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Drained was a personal project I started a little over a year ago. I needed it as much as it needed me.

The purpose of it was to drain my mind of all the clutter… all the noise… all of what I’ve been programmed and taught to say and do. (Depicted nicely in my clever banner.)

This was of course, in order to see more clearly how I could live a better life, and more importantly, be a better person.

I don’t think I’ve ever had anything in my life change me this much…

The purpose has been served, and like all things that have served their purpose, it must now end.

I’ll never forget what this blog has done for me. I’ll never forget the people that have helped me through it.

I thank you, every one of you.

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“The great thing in the world is not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving.” -Oliver Wendell Holmes 1809-1894

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Music: Hoppípolla by Sigur Rós

May 31, 2011 | Categories: Uncategorized | 4 Comments »